Day 470 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

It is Monday and Grayson was back off to the clinic this morning. The weather was beautiful today and Grayson and another patient went outside with the physical therapist and kicked a soccer ball around. Grayson required a lot of cues to pass the ball or to go get the ball, but he participated. Other highlights at the clinic today was making an eggplant sandwich – and eating it!

Regina and Grayson went to the grocery on the way home. As soon as they arrived home and we unloaded the car, Grayson and I ran back out to run some other errands. It was 7:00 tonight before we were ready to start dinner. Fortunately dinner was a salad so the "cooking" part didn't slow us down.

Grayson was alert for another day, but non-verbal for another day. We really have to pull words out of Grayson now. This part appears to be getting worse and not better. In my observation of him it is just too hard for him to speak, and he doesn't. My fear is that the longer this continues the more that the pattern becomes fixed. Let's pray that this area turns around.

Pax!

Brant

Day 469 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Today Regina had church duties so Grayson and I were on our own this morning. He woke up bright eyed and bushy tailed and we went through our morning routine and made it to church only 10 minutes late!

Since we had two cars at church, Regina took Lauren someplace and Grayson and I were on our own for lunch. As we drove to lunch we saw the mountains with their spectacular covering of snow from yesterday's storm. While we received no snow here, there were actually small accumulations in several surrounding cities including Burbank, my old home.

Tonight Regina, Grayson and I watched the entire Academy Awards for perhaps the first time since Bob Hope was the emcee! Regina and I were quite amused that Grayson caught and laughed out loud at some very subtle humor during the show. He is alert and aware, and especially so today. I just wish that we could get him to speak more.

Pax!

Brant

Day 468 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Today Grayson and I spent the day together. Regina and Lauren spent a good mom and daughter day together and Grayson was responsible for keeping me out of trouble. We had breakfast, exercised, did chores, ran errands and even cooked dinner together while the girls spent some quality time together. After dinner we watched Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade – a very fun movie that we hadn't watched in years.

Grayson was very non-verbal today. At one point I had him speaking a bit describing the pictures in his digital frame by his bed. If you have not seen it, there are about 30 pictures in a loop from his life – family vacations in Hawaii, Mama Tutu's 80^th birthday in Puerto Vallarta, pictures from our wedding, of our parents, holding Grayson on his first birthday, Scouting pictures – a real treasure that runs when he is in his room. We find him staring at it frequently. His describing the photos was about the most he spoke all day, and it was mostly in one of two word descriptions.

His cold is still bothering him, but this will pass soon.

Pax!

Brant

Day 467 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Grayson woke up more alert than he has been in the last few days. I especially noticed how quickly and deftly he went down the stairs on his way to the car this morning, something way more competent than his usual slow and halting pace (always scares us to death on the stairs!). The cold that has been getting to him seems to be waning a bit.

Rain in Southern California translates to snow in the Sierras and slow on the freeway. It took Regina forever to get home with Grayson tonight, after an equally long drive out to get him. Fortunately all arrived home safe and sound albeit a bit older. Neither of us was in any mood to cook, so we treated ourselves to a dinner out at one of our favorite Italian haunts. We had a relaxing dinner for which Grayson was surprisingly calm before coming home to enjoy the movie Social Network.

It was a nice to relax tonight!

Pax!

Brant

Day 466 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Today I flew home after spending the week in Huntsville, Alabama. I drove out to pick Grayson up at the clinic this afternoon and he was glad to see me. He greeted me with a cheery, "Hi Dad" when he saw me waiting for him to finish his therapies. I had him take me to the places where his things are stored so we could bring them home. Then I had him take me to the front door of the facility which he did. After we went out the door, I suggested that we take the stairs instead of the elevator down to the first floor. He said OK and we headed off to the stairwell. Five flights later we were walking to the car. Movement is good!

Grayson is fighting a cold this week, and we are very limited on medications that we can give him due to his condition and the meds he is on. Tonight he had an early dinner then relaxed until an early bedtime. He was pretty non-verbal all evening, but he sure gave out a lot of hugs!

It is great to be home for a few weeks!

Pax!

Brant

Day 465 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

This morning was filled with our routine. Each day begins something like this. I start by checking and answering office emails and voice messages then get myself ready for the day. I wake Grayson and guide him through his morning routine - breakfast, medication, shower and shave, dressing, and lunch preparation followed by transportation to therapies.

Today, after I dropped Grayson at the clinic, I rushed back to my office to try and squeeze 8 hours of work into 4 hours. I was so focused on getting back to the clinic in time to pick him up that I completely forgot today was one of the two days he had a ride home this week. Not a critical error but it cost about an hour and a half of productive time at the office.

When we returned home tonight, Grayson surprised me. We walked into the kitchen and deposited my purse, briefcase, and Grayson's lunch box on the kitchen counter. After a stop in the restroom (it was an hour drive home) we returned to the kitchen. As I was opening the mail, Grayson walked over to the counter, unzipped his lunchbox, put the dirty Tupperware container in the sink and the reusable ice block into the freezer. All without any reminder, request or coaching. This was a first.

Some days I have to look for something to be hopeful about – today it was a gift just handed to me.

I am filled with gratitude for that simple gift (and that Brant comes home tomorrow after three work weeks in three states).

Regina

Day 464 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

Early in the evening Grayson and I played Dominoes. It was hard for him to look at the game pieces and think at the same time. He frequently scratched his scalp and ducked his head away from directly looking at the table. He got so wiggly that he jumped up from chair several times and had to be encouraged to sit back down. When asked he said he still wanted to play. When it was his turn he played very quickly. You wouldn't think he had even looked at his dominoes. He did, however, beat me four straight games.

Tonight Grayson resorted to simply pointing at whatever he wanted and it took much coaching to get him to verbally express himself. Since I know his routines and facial expressions so well, it would be easy to allow this "lazy" method. That would be a disservice to him in the long run.

Most nights when Grayson is ready for bed, he goes to the book shelf and selects a book to read for a ½ hour or so before I turn the light out. Tonight when I suggested he get a book, he stood in the center, looked around the room and seemed a bit lost - as if he couldn't remember where the books were. Finally when I gestured to the book shelf, he slowly walked over and retrieved one.

Each day brings challenges for him.

Grace and peace,

Regina

Day 463 – Grayson’s Journey

Since the clinic was closed for the President's Day holiday, Grayson and I spent a delightful day together.

Among the many games, errands, and chores we did together, two things stand out. First, at three separate times today he answered my question with a three word answer. Perhaps he is beginning to realize that when he answers me with a one word answer I usually ask him to restate it using a complete sentence. Perhaps it is merely a function of a more "with it" type day for him. Most probably it is a result of the combination of both.

The second little treasure involved music. I asked him if he would like to play the electric keyboard with me. When he said he would, I played Row, Row, Row Your Boat through two times. Then I played the first five notes twice in a row. I asked him to play the first five notes. He played them perfectly.

Little victories, great big strides. Even bigger smiles.

Grace and peace be with you,

Regina

Day 462 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Today Grayson was alert as yesterday, but also like yesterday he was very non-verbal. A new pattern to watch!

We got up and went to church this morning, then went to lunch in La Canada. We were stunned by the snow level on the local mountains! It is rare that we see snow down at such a low elevation here in the LA area. Of course, most of it was gone by mid afternoon, but it was fun to see.

I have an early flight in the morning, so I'll sign off now.

Pax!

Brant

Day 461 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

To was a great stay-at-home day. We relaxed this morning, took a walk between rainstorms with Grayson, caught up on chores and had a light dinner while watching one of Grayson's favorite shows, House.

Grayson was very alert today, but he was also very non-verbal. That combination is not typical – alertness usually is accompanied by an increase in verbal expression. Nonetheless he was quite aware of his surroundings, was quite alert and he was engaged in a number of our activities today.

In spite of the rain, it was a nice quiet day!

Pax!

Brant

Day 460 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

I returned this evening from a week in sunny Seattle. Actually, Seattle WAS sunny this morning, unusual as that is. I flew back to LA and it was pouring rain. Go figure!

Grayson was happy to see me. Regina reported that he was as alert as he has been in several days when he got up this morning. When I joined them at our favorite Thai restaurant this evening on my way home from the airport he was still quite alert. He was observant, looking around the restaurant, taking in everything. He was even a bit more verbal tonight – always a nice thing.

It is great to be home again!

Pax!

Brant

Day 459 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

Grayson was awake and alert when I went into his room this morning. This was a most welcome change since he has been in somewhat of a fog for the last eight days.

By this afternoon he was more animated and responded to my teasing with a big grin and humorous responses. He answered several series of questions and was able to formulate answers of two to three words rather than his usual one. After dinner we danced and exercised to music.

After so many days of seeing Grayson seem to slide backwards, this slight improvement was just what I needed to refocus my own attitude. The uneven and uncertain path of progress can be rough if you look too far into the future.

In God's time – not ours.

Grace and peace to you all, my friends.

Regina

Day 458 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

This morning started out very slow again.

Grayson had difficulty remembering how to pull his chair out in order to sit for breakfast. Later he was stuck and not able to initiate putting his sweat pants on. These situations illustrate how imperative it is to be sensitive and either increase or decrease cueing and assistance without encouraging him to become more dependant. Without a doubt it is easier and faster to do things for him. Just as certain, that approach would insure that he not exercise and strengthen those brain paths.

Our life experience tells us that once you know how to do something, you should know tomorrow as well – and the day after that should be even easier. Not so with brain injury. Repetition may indeed be building toward progress but the building surely is built on shifting ground.

Later tonight I read several chapters of H. G. Wells The Time Traveler to Grayson. At the end of each chapter, I quizzed him on details to work on his memory and comprehension. Like a young child, he leaned close and looked at the pictures as I read. He was able to answer all my questions accurately, though getting more than a single word answer took some effort.

Day by day, page by page . . .

Grace and peace,

Regina

Day 457 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

This evening Grayson helped me prepare dinner and clear the table. He wiped down the counters and emptied his lunch box. He also helped me carry several loads of trash and recycle down two flights of stairs. He was able to turn his sweatshirt right-side out and put it on without any assistance (only minor cues) twice today.

He decided on which wall in his room he wants to hang his pirate flag. I also hung a new calendar on his wall (with pictures of the cast of "House") so that we can cross off the date each morning. This gives him a handy reference to find the correct month, day, and year. Without such a tool he has no way to recall this information.

While Grayson was still fairly non-verbal, I was able to coax a few more words and sentences out of him tonight. It is particularly nice when I can get him to use his voice rather than pointing.

It is just starting to rain gently and Grayson is peacefully tucked into bed for the night. He read in bed for about an hour (the same book he reads every night) and was ready for lights out.

Grace and peace,

Regina

Day 456 – Grayson’s Journey

2/12/11

Dear family and friends,

Some days just don't feel like progress. It is frustrating and a little frightening when there is a long string of days where Grayson seems to have gone several steps backward.

He has been fairly non-verbal for several days now and is frequently stuck executing the simplest of tasks again. His eyes are blood shot and lack the clarity of alert mental tracking. Makes me wish I could tell what goes on inside his body and mind to cause such disparate responses and abilities.

It is an endless series of lessons in trust, patience, and perseverance for Grayson and for us.

Some days I do better than others in meeting the challenges. All days I am grateful for the opportunity to love him.

Happy day of love to each of you.

Grace and peace,

Regina

Day 455 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Grayson was alert but quiet all day. Today we had a busy day of catching up on chores on my weekend between trips. Grayson was a champ helping, but was mostly non-verbal.

After we returned home this afternoon, Grayson and I took a walk together to get his blood pumping a bit harder, but it is a challenge to keep him moving faster than a stroll. Still the exercise is good for him.

We continue to make progress even if it is at a very slow rate!

Pax!

Brant

Day 454 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

After a day running errands and doing chores with Grayson, we had the gift of an early Valentine date tonight. Austin and Xixi volunteered to come by and watch Grayson to give us a night out together – something we don't do very often these days! We watched The King's Speech and it was an engaging movie that we thoroughly enjoyed. Afterward we went out to dinner at one of our favorite Italian restaurants for a scrumptious dinner. It was a wonderful night – Thank you Austin and Xixi!

Pax!

Brant

Day 453 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

I'm back home after a week in Houston TX and Huntsville AL. Those normally temperate cities were mighty cold this week, and we got enough snow to really mess things up in Huntsville Thursday!

I picked Grayson up from the clinic this afternoon and he was happy to see me. Tonight Lauren and a friend joined us for dinner at our favorite Chinese restaurant, New Moon. It is hard for Grayson to be patient while sitting and waiting for food, but tonight he did fairly well. We sat in a booth and put Grayson between Regina and me and that kept him from jumping up. He also was pretty occupied people watching, so he had a few things other than "Where is my food" to focus on!

It is good to be home where tomorrow it will be sunny and 76°!

Pax!

Brant

Day 452 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,


Grayson was fairly low energy again today and his words were very hard to understand. I was happy just to have him successfully walk through his daily living tasks.

At the clinic this week, one of the staff stopped to talk to us and to comment on just how much Grayson had improved since he saw him last. It was one of the staff who worked with Grayson last year in Bakersfield. From the perspective of not having seen Grayson for many months, this staff member was impressed by what he saw as a dramatic improvement.

Sometimes it really is hard to see the forest when you are so close to the trees.

Grace and peace – and good night,

Regina

Day 451 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

Brain injuries are very curious. By that I mean each morning we wait to see what we have to work with that day. As I mentioned over the last week, some days Grayson seems to have more connections being made than others. On those days he can speak more clearly, follow more complex instructions, and appears to be calmer. These are the days when we can expect more of him and give fewer cues to complete a task. His eyes are bright and it is easy to see that he is tracking right along with me.

Other days, when the fog seems to be clouding his mind, he requires many more direct cues and in some instances actual hands-on assistance. His eyes reflect a lack of brightness and he seems more confused.

Today he was foggy in the morning, slightly more alert by noon, and quite restless by this evening. He was impatient for dinner and yet couldn't stay seated long enough to finish it. He kept standing up like he just couldn't handle sitting still. He scratched his head repeatedly and seemed to have a lot of neurological "noise" going on inside. He could barely concentrate long enough to even do a cursory brushing of his teeth (he takes his turn and then I re-brush them).

Every day is different. It is much like a sensitive dance. Minute by minute we must ascertain where he is and meet him right there. Drawing him forward, challenging him, without enabling him to become completely dependent on our help. The tricky part is that the starting point keeps moving.

The challenges are similar to those we faced raising young children but the progression was much more linear then.

Never a dull day – that's for sure. I wonder what tomorrow will be like.

Grace and peace,

Regina

Day 450 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

After nearly a week of increased alertness and verbalizing, Grayson awoke in a slow motion fog. Movements were back to being slow and uncertain. His verbal responses were either "yeah" or some other simple one word answer and he seemed stuck trying to execute the sequence of simple tasks.

It would be easy to get disappointed but as Brant's cousin Doug said, "We'll be patient and prayerful, because God isn't finished with Grayson [or the rest of us] yet!"

Tomorrow we will rise again.

Grace and peace,

Regina

Day 449 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

At the clinic today, Grayson worked on following three-step verbal instructions as well as on decreasing his rate of speech with three-syllable words. Both of these are areas I work on with him at home on a daily basis.

In physical therapy he kicked and passed a soccer ball with weights on his ankles and wrists. Following this was a period of stair climbing.

In occupational therapy the focus was on coordination – specifically fine motor coordination with coins and on gross motor coordination utilizing the practical skill of wiping tables. Usually when I have Grayson wipe the table, he uses small strokes somewhat inefficiently swiping AT the table. Tonight he took the sponge, reached across the whole table wiped quite effectively. He followed that by completely drying it with a dry towel. There is certainly something to be said about reinforcing in the evening what he practices at the clinic during the day.

Following dinner and cleanup, Grayson expressed a desire to watch TV. I explained that he could watch a new episode of House at 8:00 and gave him several options for activities to fill the time until then. He helped me put new sheets on his bed, put in a load of laundry, changed clothes, brushed teeth, and then read until 8:00. At the end of the episode, I asked if he knew what time it was. His response was, "Time for bed". He said goodnight to Austin and Xixi (who were making rice cakes downstairs) and headed straight to bed.

About six days in a row of improved alertness and verbalizing. I'll take every minute of it with gratitude.

Grace and peace to you,

Regina

Day 448 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends,

On Friday, Grayson danced with me at my brother's birthday party, asked my sister Rita to dance and then did the twist with cousin Kimberly. He stayed engaged for three hours and was able to handle a lively Elks Club banquet hall with about 50 guests talking, eating, laughing, and dancing - all the while with an amplified singer. This was amazing.

On Saturday, as I was walking down the stairs, I overheard a conversation between Grayson and Brant. Not just Brant asking questions or a running one sided conversation, but both of their voices coming from the kitchen. What a wonderful sound.

Today, during our church service, Grayson joined me in singing (with encouragement), "Lamb of God, who takes away the sin of the world, have mercy on us". Not just a word but all three repetitions.

He communicated to me when he was hungry, when he needed to use the restroom, and when he wanted to watch TV. Granted he started by either pointing to his mouth (or the TV) or by walking out of the room to the restroom. When I asked him to use his words he was able to verbally communicate his desires.

Day by day, the inches add up.

With thanks to God, I lift up these simple joys.

Grace and peace to each of you,

Regina

Day 447 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Lauren watched Grayson while we were teaching Cub Scout leaders songs this morning. Lauren did a fine job and Grayson had a good morning with his sister.

Grayson's recent improvements are still with us. It was like a step function increase last week rather than a gradual improvement, but the gains have stuck for several days. These changes in Grayson do not evenly remotely indicate a return to independent functionality, but they do represent the potential for an slight improvement in his quality of life. We pray that these improvements stick and that many more tiny steps are in his future!

Pax!

Brant

Day 446 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

I'll be very brief this evening, as Regina and I will be up in just a few hours to teach Cub Scout leaders how to lead songs!

Grayson had yet another good day. He awoke bright eyed and was quite alert at a birthday party for Regina's brother, Howie. He danced with several ladies after dinner, and he remembered who was at the party when we returned home.

All good signs!

Pax!

Brant

Day 445 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Grayson had another bright eyed day! The highlight for me was just before dinner. Regina and I were talking about our Songs class that we teach annually at a Cub Scout leader training event and we started doing a few of the silly song favorites that have become our trademark. Grayson remembered the songs and started doing the silly hand motions with us. Then I said, "Who's on second?" Grayson responded, "Who's on first!" Regina and I howled! We played with it a bit more and all laughed. For some of you, you may have seen Grayson and me do that skit together when he was younger. We learned it when Grayson was in fifth grade and performed at a bunch of Scout campfires over the next several years. He was so good and always a crowd pleaser – and it was especially fun to watch this young kid act out the skit! If you are not familiar with this old Abbott and Costello skit, you need to see it. Google it and watch!

Grayson was also especially helpful making his bed this evening. His dexterity and patience usually gets the better of him when doing chores like this, but tonight he did a great job working with Regina to get everything tucked in just right!

Another good day!

Pax!

Brant

Day 444 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Grayson again woke up bright eyed this morning. While not quite as alert as yesterday, he was much more articulate and vocal than he is typically. With prompting he was attempting five word sentences, and he was doing three word sentences without prompting.

Encouraging signs continue!

Pax!

Brant

Day 443 – Grayson’s Journey

Dear family and friends

Today was one of those days – those good days!

Grayson was alert from the time he woke up until he went to bed, and perhaps a bit beyond that. (The bedroom alarm just went off, meaning that he walked out of his room!) He was talking more today than we have seen in close to a year. Early on in his recovery he spoke a lot but most of it was intelligible. At one point he just stopped trying. We are guessing that he was not being understood and just sort of gave up after being asked to repeat everything three or four times. Most of his verbal communication of the past year has been one or two word answers. Tonight it was easy to prompt him to use sentences of three to five words.

Quite a fun and encouraging evening!

Pax!

Brant